Just for Today – December 9 – Listening

“This ability to listen is a gift and grows as we grow spiritually. Life takes on a new meaning when we open ourselves to this gift.”
– Basic Text, page 102

Listening is a fundamental skill that deepens our relationships, enhances our spiritual growth, and fosters understanding. In active addiction, self-obsession often made true listening impossible. In recovery, we learn that listening is more than just hearing words—it’s about being present, setting aside our thoughts, and truly connecting with others.

The Struggle to Listen

In early recovery, listening can feel unfamiliar and challenging. Many of us are accustomed to focusing on ourselves, preoccupied with what we’ll say next or how we’ll respond. This self-obsession can create barriers to effective communication.

Common Obstacles to Listening:

1. Planning Responses: Focusing on what we’ll say instead of what’s being said.
2. Self-Obsession: Centering the conversation around ourselves, even when it’s someone else’s time to share.
3. Distractions: Letting our thoughts wander or getting caught up in external noise.

These habits prevent us from fully engaging with others and understanding their experiences.

The Gift of True Listening

Listening is more than an act—it’s a gift we offer others and ourselves. When we truly listen, we:

• Build Connection: Others feel valued and understood.
• Gain Perspective: We learn from others’ experiences and insights.
• Foster Empathy: Listening allows us to step outside of ourselves and into someone else’s world.

As we grow spiritually, our ability to listen deepens, enhancing our relationships and sense of community.

Practicing the Art of Listening

Listening is a skill that improves with practice. By being intentional, we can develop habits that foster deeper connections.

Tips for Becoming a Better Listener:

1. Be Present: Focus entirely on the speaker, setting aside distractions and internal chatter.
2. Acknowledge What You Hear: Summarize or reflect back what the other person is saying to show understanding.
3. Ask Questions: Encourage deeper sharing by asking thoughtful, open-ended questions.
4. Resist the Urge to Fix: Sometimes, people just want to be heard, not offered solutions.

Each time we practice listening, we strengthen our ability to connect with others meaningfully.

Listening as a Spiritual Practice

Listening is not just a social skill; it’s a spiritual practice. By quieting our thoughts and focusing on others, we open ourselves to the present moment and to the lessons others have to offer. This practice helps us step away from self-centeredness, aligning us with spiritual principles like humility, empathy, and love.

Life Beyond Self-Obsession

As we grow in recovery, listening becomes a vital tool for living in harmony with others. It frees us from the isolation of self-obsession, helping us forge deeper, more authentic relationships.